


not yet

by isurani



Category: Kamen Rider Saber
Genre: Episode Related, Gen, POV Second Person, also big episode 12 spoilers, its kentouma if you squint
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-30
Updated: 2020-11-30
Packaged: 2021-03-10 01:34:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 745
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27796249
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/isurani/pseuds/isurani
Summary: the three of us will always be together,but you don’t really believe that, do you?
Comments: 3
Kudos: 19





	not yet

touma has you in his arms, and of course you’re being protected again. you repeat the same mistakes over and over, but you’re still being protected, even now.

you didn’t accomplish anything, didn’t save anyone, but right now, seeing touma, you’re happy.

you think he hates that you are, the way he’s shaking his head.

you’re still putting up a fake smile to the end, and isn’t that just like you. you smile, and he holds you so gently and desperately that right now, you want to be the one protecting him, but what can you do with those hands still shaking?

the only strength you have left is the strength to smile. it almost feels like that’s all you’ve ever had, the strength to push away others with plastic words of “it’s fine”, “i’m okay”.

touma could see right through it. touma sees right through you, even now.

you wonder if he can tell that you’re scared. you’re scared, you’re scared of  _ dying _ but all you can do is laugh, and look at touma.

touma’s emotions have always been written so plainly on his face. he’s an open book in of himself, really, and the meaning is so literal it’s just another thing you like about touma.

you meant it, too, when you swore that calibur would never lay a hand on touma. not as long as you lived.

\-- as long as you lived to protect him.

there’s a way the moonlight hits him, the light reflected in his eyes, how soft they are - you’re staring, and he’s calling your name again, but can you be blamed for not hearing? your vision blurs for a second, but touma’s still there. you want touma to still be there.

you’re so happy, seeing him again. even after it all, you didn’t lose him. 

you never want to lose him again.

it’s a promise to yourself, one he won’t hear so that he’ll never break it.

touma apologizes. he remembers everything, now, does he? another ugly mark you’ve left on him, that blank slate now scratched into a biting red.

you want to fight with him, you want to fight  _ for _ him. you can’t make up your own mind, and touma’s eyes have red of their own now, though perhaps you’re just imagining how they burn like the fires of rekka itself.

his hands are rougher now too, you realize. not in the way he’s always held the pen, but the way of two hands on a sword, hands that have gone through fire and armor and metal. they’re like your own hands, now.

it’s funny, how it’s suddenly harder to breathe when touma’s hands are on your own. it’s funny, a joke at your expense.

we’ll save her together, touma says to you, and of course he would say that even as he’s shaking and you can see the tears threatening to fall. he’s so predictable - or maybe you’re the predictable one, and he’s the one that’s changing.

he’s the one that’s changed so much after you lost him, after all, so much that you feel like he’ll slip out of your hands.

you’re not really sure what you’re saying to him, about your dad and wanting to stop it all, but touma stops you with a desperate sort of cry, and you’re so easily quieted by it. 

you tell him how happy you were to see him, instead. because you were happy, you  _ are _ happy, touma’s so different and so the same. there’s still the way he holds onto promises like an oath, the resolution, the determination. the love of stories and other worlds.

other worlds in fairytales are always so kind, after all, not a hand raising up to the sky where it can never reach.

you’re probably rambling. you’re happy. everything else seems so far away, but touma is here, and you’re happy. you still can’t breathe, not quite right.

can he reach? can you reach?

touma is right there, right in front of you. he has been the whole time, but it feels like you’re reaching too far. the distance is just too much.

he’s speaking to you, still, reminding you of your promise. you nod, over and over, because you’re happy.

you want touma to stay.

“the three of us will always be together,”

just a little longer. just a little longer.

his hand almost makes it to yours,

but you break the promise as soon as you touch the ground.

**Author's Note:**

> i caught up to saber for the first time since it started. my favorite is the emo yellow boy with so many problems and issues.
> 
> whoops.


End file.
